“Apprentice: I’ve just started to realise that I’m a dreadful flirt!
Teachers: It’s important to understand that these things you notice about yourself have always been there – you just start to see it because of practice. You are not suddenly becoming a more neurotic person or developing new bad habits. Playfulness in relationship with others is fine as long as it does not undermine or conflict with your relationship with your partner, or the flirting becomes inappropriately sexual in its nature. If the flirting overflows into fantasising about another person or wishing for a romantic relationship with someone other than your partner, then there is the danger of this becoming adulterous. If it becomes behaviour that suggests inappropriate intent, then this is not conducive to whole-hearted conduct. Playfulness is enjoyable for everyone, but must include awareness, and honourable behaviour and intent.”
page 150, Illusory Advice, Ngakma Nor’dzin & Ngakpa ’ö-Dzin, Aro Books Worldwide, 2016, ISBN: 978-1-898185-37-6